Audrey Quotes
Quote from the episode The 6:10 to Lubbock
Mandy: Busy?
Audrey: Just sending the U.S. government more of our hard-earned money to piss away.
Quote from the episode Some New York Nonsense
Audrey: So... I couldn't help overhearing you and Georgie arguing last night.
Mandy: You were eavesdropping?
Audrey: Eavesdropping is when you want to listen. Overhearing is when you have no choice.
Quote from the episode Todd's Mom
Jim: Kind of bummed we lost our bridge partners.
Connor: I'll play with you.
Audrey: That's nice, but it's a four-person game.
Connor: We could play something else.
Audrey: How about Scrabble?
Jim: How about something I'm good at?
Audrey: Reading on the toilet is not a game, Jim.
Quote from the episode Thanksgiving
Jim: Maybe next year, we can take CeeCee to the Macy's Parade.
Audrey: [gasps] You're not taking my granddaughter to New York City. She'll come back a Democrat.
Mandy: She's a baby.
Audrey: A God-fearing, Republican baby.
Quote from the episode A Regular Samaritan
Mandy: We're not really church people.
Audrey: Why would you say that? Of course we are.
Jim: When was the last time we went to church?
Audrey: When Georgie's father... I don't recall.
Quote from the episode A Regular Samaritan
Georgie: Mandy?
Mandy: Well, Sunday's my one day to sleep in, but if you want to go, you should go.
Georgie: All right. What about you, CeeCee? You want to come to church with Daddy?
Audrey: Hands off, she's Catholic.
Quote from the episode An Old Mustang
Audrey: Have you seen that new Friends show?
Mandy: No.
Audrey: All they do is drink coffee. Who can drink that much coffee?
Mandy: I don't know.
Audrey: And their mugs are like soup bowls. Is that a New York thing?
Mandy: Mom, I don't know.
Audrey: I miss Cosby. He was a nice family man.
Quote from the episode An Old Mustang
Mandy: I think it's sweet they have something to do together.
Audrey: Your dad always hoped to rebuild the Mustang with Connor.
Mandy: Seriously? Dad and Connor?
Audrey: Go look in the attic. There's footballs, baseballs, fishing poles, bows and arrows. Your father tried everything. He did not give up on your brother.
Mandy: So what happened?
Audrey: He gave up.
Quote from the episode A Tire Convention and the Moral High Ground
Audrey: Before you leave, would you take a look at the toilet in our bathroom?
Jim: Oh, you just have to jiggle the handle.
Audrey: I prefer not to jiggle, Jim.
Quote from the episode A Tire Convention and the Moral High Ground
Connor: What's wrong with her?
Mandy: Oh, she had a couple beers.
Audrey: I had a couple beers. [slaps Connor's thigh]
Mandy: And a couple shots.
Audrey: Tequila!
Mandy: Is everything okay with CeeCee?
Connor: Sound asleep.
Audrey: [holding Connor's face] Oh, we need to find you a girl so you can have your own babies. [to Mandy] When are you gonna have more? You're not getting any younger.