Audrey: How's your music going?
Connor: Excellent. I'm working on a piece in seven-four time. ♪ One-two-three, one-two, one-two ♪ ♪ One-two-three, one-two, one-two. ♪ It's impossible to dance to.

Connor: Mother, can I borrow your car?
Audrey: Why?
Connor: I need to drive to a music store in Houston to get a 12AT7 dual-triode vacuum tube for my amp.
Audrey: I need my car. Does it have to be today?
Connor: If I wait too long, they might sell out.
Mandy: No one's buying weird vacuum tubes but you.
Connor: If you could only hear how foolish you sound.

Connor: Good news, got the vacuum tube.
Audrey: Ooh, that's great, honey.
Connor: The, uh, owner of the store was a roadie for Bob Seger. He's got a cat named Night Moves. She had a lot of nipples.
Mandy: That's a weird thing to say.
Connor: It was a weird thing to see.

Connor: I have a game we can play. I'm a thing. You have 20 questions. Go.
Jim: I don't want to play that.
Audrey: I do. Are you a vegetable?
Connor: No. 19.
Jim: What kind of first question is that? It's too specific.
Audrey: I thought you weren't playing.
Jim: I'm not, but if I was, I'd ask a better first question.
Audrey: Like what?
Jim: Like, "Are you a living thing?"
Connor: No. 18.
Audrey: Great question.
Jim: But now we know it's not alive. It is a good question, right?
Connor: Yes. 17.
Jim: You're counting that?
Connor: Yes. 16.
Jim: Oh, come on!

Audrey: Okay, so we know it's not musical. We know it's not a machine. But it is man-made.
Jim: Got to be smart about this.
Audrey: You're the one who wasted two questions.
Jim: Well, they shouldn't have counted.
Connor: But they did, didn't they?

Jim: Okay. We know it's not a tangible object.
Audrey: It can't be bought. It's odorless. And it's in this room right now.
Jim: We only have one question left. We have to guess.
Audrey: What are you thinking? [Jim whispers in Audrey's ear] Agreed. Go for it.
Jim: Are you time?
Connor: Ooh, good guess.
Jim: Did we get it?
Connor: No.
Jim: Son of a bitch!
Audrey: Damn it!
Jim: So, what was it?
Connor: Sorry, you're out of questions.
Jim: You're really not gonna tell us?
Connor: Thanks for playing. [exits]
Audrey: You get back here right now and you tell us!
Jim: I don't know why you like him.

Jim: Why you all dressed up?
Connor: I was told to look nice for company.
Jim: That meant take a shower.
Connor: Oh. Be right back.

Georgie: You'll be okay with CeeCee while I'm gone?
Mandy: Of course.
Audrey: Plus, Grandma's here.
Connor: And I can always lend a hand.
Jim: Have you ever even held a baby?
Connor: I've held an accordion. How different can it be?
Jim: You don't squeeze a baby.
Connor: Got it.

Connor: Okay. This is a song about me and you. [backing track plays] [sings] ♪ ♪ Now this right here's a story ♪ ♪ About a baby and a man ♪ ♪ One day they got together ♪ ♪ And decided to form a band ♪ ♪ Now the baby didn't do much ♪ ♪ And the man wrote all the songs ♪ ♪ But it didn't seem to matter ♪ ♪ With how well they got along ♪ ♪ Baby-man, baby-man ♪ ♪ One member is a baby ♪ ♪ And the other is a man ♪ ♪ Baby-man, baby-man ♪ ♪ Believe me you will never see ♪ ♪ A spectacle so grand ♪

Connor: Let's see what we're dealing with. [places the back of his hand on Georgie's forehead] Oh, yeah, that's a fever. I'm gonna say 102.
Georgie: You don't know that.
Connor: A rectal thermometer would be more precise. But I don't think you and I are there yet.

Connor: At least take some ibuprofen, bring your temperature down.
Georgie: Okay.
Connor: We also need to run the shower, get some steam going, break up the congestion, and while it's a little outside the medical mainstream, two fingers of Kentucky bourbon to help you sleep.
Georgie: Your mom teach you all that?
Connor: No, I watched an episode of The Golden Girls where Rose caught a doozy of a cold. Really messed with Blanche's date that night.
Georgie: That's a good show.
Connor: [chuckles] They're old, but full of life. [Georgie coughs] You go to bed, Rose. Sophia's on the case.

Mandy: What you doing?
Connor: Uh, a pan in the dishwasher's making a cool rhythm.
Mandy: So, you're not on any drugs at all, this is just you?
Connor: I do take a multivitamin.
Mandy: Are you snorting it? [exits]
Connor: Who needs a drummer? I got a Maytag.

Connor: Can I get your opinion on something?
Mandy: Sure.
Connor: I made a song out of the sounds of our house.
Mandy: Cool.
Connor: It's called "The Sounds of Our House."
Mandy: Clever.
Connor: [song of household appliance noises plays] That's the dishwasher. Vacuum. Front door.
Mandy: Huh. This is actually fun.
Connor: I'm actually fun. [CeeCee crying over recording]
Mandy: [gasps] Is that CeeCee?
Connor: She got the solo. [modulated crying] [toilet flushes over recording]
Mandy: So what's your question?
Connor: How great is this?
Mandy: It's pretty great.
Connor: I know.