Audrey: Remember when you wanted to be a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader?
Mandy: There's still time. [off Jim's look] There is!
Jim: Yeah, and I'm gonna be an aerobics instructor.

Jim: You know, Georgie's right, when you don't hear people laughing, it's hard to know what's funny. [Georgie and Mandy's First Marriage studio audience laughs]

Jim: Well, here's an idea, how about you take some night classes, brush up on your computer skills and get a nice, cushy office job?
Mandy: Office job? Why did I spend six years getting a degree in Communications?
Jim: I asked that question for six years.
Mandy: Well, I'm not giving up on my dream.
Audrey: No one's saying that.
Jim: I am.

Jim: Well, be careful. I own a timeshare in Florida 'cause the saleslady looked like Raquel Welch.
Georgie: I don't know who that is.
Jim: Oh, she was a knockout. Had curves in all the right places. She wore this fur bikini in a movie. Man, I still think about it.
Georgie: Fur bikini?
Ruben: Was she cold?
Jim: Get back to work. [exits]
Georgie: [snorts] "Curves in all the right places."
Ruben: Dude is old.

Mandy: Okay, how do I look?
Jim: Beautiful as always.
Audrey: A little too much cleavage.
Mandy: Well, when I'm not working for tips, I'll cover up.
Audrey: Is that the lesson you want to teach your daughter?
Mandy: Are you kidding? These are all I am to her.

Georgie: It's a nice car you got.
Valerie: Well, God is good.
Georgie: Oh, you're one of them.
Valerie: "One of them"?
Georgie: I don't mean nothing by it. My mom's one of them, too.
Valerie: Blessed with the abundance of God's love?
Georgie: Yep, definitely one of them.

Georgie: Hey, what do you think about coming to church with me on Sunday?
Mandy: Church? You want pancakes, just tell me.
Georgie: No, this lady I towed last night was telling me how her church is all about prosperity and making money.
Mandy: So?
Georgie: So, those are two of my favorite things.