Jim: So what's the plan?
Audrey: Well, for starters, I think I'm gonna go buy some plants, flowers. Ooh, maybe a little music.
Georgie: Mm, engaging the senses. [chuckles] That's right out of Cosmo.
Audrey: And this floor, does it bother you that it's sticky?
Jim: Well, no, that's a safety precaution. Yeah. Never had a slip and fall.
Audrey: Jim, it's filthy.
Jim: Well, we're not eating off it, we're walking on it.
Audrey: Georgie, go to the hardware store and buy a mop, Pine-Sol, some wire brushes.
Georgie: I can pick up that toilet seat while I'm at it.
Audrey: This is my second cup of coffee. Please hurry.

Mandy: Busy?
Audrey: Just sending the U.S. government more of our hard-earned money to piss away.

Audrey: So... I couldn't help overhearing you and Georgie arguing last night.
Mandy: You were eavesdropping?
Audrey: Eavesdropping is when you want to listen. Overhearing is when you have no choice.

Jim: Kind of bummed we lost our bridge partners.
Connor: I'll play with you.
Audrey: That's nice, but it's a four-person game.
Connor: We could play something else.
Audrey: How about Scrabble?
Jim: How about something I'm good at?
Audrey: Reading on the toilet is not a game, Jim.

Ruben: Why are you reading Cosmo?
Georgie: Trying to learn how women think. Did you know there's a lot of dirty stuff in here?
Ruben: Are there pictures?
Georgie: Sometimes.
Ruben: Hmm.
Georgie: Listen to this, "The Health Benefits of Sex." "Travels in His... Erogenous Zone"? I don't know what that is.

Georgie: I figure, with just a few changes, we could be the only woman-friendly tire store in town.
Mandy: This ought to be good. What changes?
Georgie: For starters, we got some lady magazines for the waiting area.
Jim: And flavored creamers for the coffee.
Georgie: Fat-free. Y'all like fat-free.

Mandy: I don't know, Georgie, it kind of seems like the frog and the boiling water.
Georgie: What's that?
Mandy: Well, it's a metaphor. The frog is in a pot of water, and the heat gets turned up little by little so it doesn't notice it's boiling.
Georgie: Who's boiling a frog?
Mandy: It doesn't matter.
Georgie: Are they making frog soup?
Mandy: It's not a real thing.
Georgie: Oh, good, 'cause I would not eat frog soup.
Mandy: I-I'm just saying, my mom's gradually starting to like you, so maybe don't turn up the heat too fast.