Mandy: Everything okay?
Georgie: Not really. She and Dale broke up.
Jim: Oh, that's too bad. How come?
Georgie: Oh, uh, I'd rather not gossip.
Jim: Well, in my experience, it's usually either sex or money. Course, given that they're 180 years old, it's money.

Jim: Well, be careful. I own a timeshare in Florida 'cause the saleslady looked like Raquel Welch.
Georgie: I don't know who that is.
Jim: Oh, she was a knockout. Had curves in all the right places. She wore this fur bikini in a movie. Man, I still think about it.
Georgie: Fur bikini?
Ruben: Was she cold?
Jim: Get back to work. [exits]
Georgie: [snorts] "Curves in all the right places."
Ruben: Dude is old.

Jim: Well, here's an idea, how about you take some night classes, brush up on your computer skills and get a nice, cushy office job?
Mandy: Office job? Why did I spend six years getting a degree in Communications?
Jim: I asked that question for six years.
Mandy: Well, I'm not giving up on my dream.
Audrey: No one's saying that.
Jim: I am.

Jim: You know, Georgie's right, when you don't hear people laughing, it's hard to know what's funny. [Georgie and Mandy's First Marriage studio audience laughs]

Mandy: Okay, how we doing over here?
Roy: My fries are a little cold.
Mandy: You mean, the fries I brought you 30 minutes ago?
Roy: Well, excuse me for savoring my meal.
Mandy: No, no, I'm just- I'm glad you're enjoying it.
Roy: I'd enjoy it more if my fries weren't cold.
Mandy: Do you want me to heat those up for you?
Roy: You gonna use a microwave?
Mandy: Yeah.
Roy: They're gonna get soggy.
Mandy: Okay, how about a fresh plate of fries?
Roy: For free?
Mandy: No.
Roy: Cold is fine.

Meemaw: [on the payphone] All right, I got you down for 50 on Medford to cover the spread.
Mandy: Hey, Connie.
Meemaw: [hangs up] Hey.
Mandy: Uh, what you doing?
Meemaw: Oh, nothing, just making a little phone call.
Mandy: Oh. Everything okay?
Meemaw: Yeah, yeah, it's just, you know, I remembered to call in a... prescription.
Mandy: Okay. Well, uh, do you want to come in and grab some coffee? We can catch up.
Meemaw: Sure. That would be nice. [phone ringing]
Mandy: Who calls a pay phone? [reaches for the phone]
Meemaw: I got it. [answers phone] Hello? Oh. It's my pharmacy. Could I have a minute?

Mandy: What's going on?
Meemaw: Nothing.
Mandy: Seems like something.
Meemaw: Well, it's not. [pager chiming] Can I call you back?
Mandy: Are you selling drugs?
Meemaw: Don't be crazy. I'm not a drug dealer.
Mandy: Okay, well, then, what?
Meemaw: I'm a bookie.