Answering Machine: You have one new message. [beeps]
Jay Leno: [on answering machine] Hey, Connor. Jay Leno here. Just wanted to say thanks for the care package. You know, you could never... have too many socks. Anyway, listen, hey, if you're ever in L.A., if you want to come by and jam with The Tonight Show band, the guys would love it. See ya. [machine beeps]
Audrey: Connor?

Mandy: What you doing?
Connor: Uh, a pan in the dishwasher's making a cool rhythm.
Mandy: So, you're not on any drugs at all, this is just you?
Connor: I do take a multivitamin.
Mandy: Are you snorting it? [exits]
Connor: Who needs a drummer? I got a Maytag.

Audrey: How's your music going?
Connor: Excellent. I'm working on a piece in seven-four time. ♪ One-two-three, one-two, one-two ♪ ♪ One-two-three, one-two, one-two. ♪ It's impossible to dance to.

Connor: Can I get your opinion on something?
Mandy: Sure.
Connor: I made a song out of the sounds of our house.
Mandy: Cool.
Connor: It's called "The Sounds of Our House."
Mandy: Clever.
Connor: [song of household appliance noises plays] That's the dishwasher. Vacuum. Front door.
Mandy: Huh. This is actually fun.
Connor: I'm actually fun. [CeeCee crying over recording]
Mandy: [gasps] Is that CeeCee?
Connor: She got the solo. [modulated crying] [toilet flushes over recording]
Mandy: So what's your question?
Connor: How great is this?
Mandy: It's pretty great.
Connor: I know.

Mandy: Huh, weird.
Audrey: What?
Mandy: Well, this article says to put cabbage leaves in your bra when you're ready to stop breastfeeding.
Audrey: Why would you do that?
Mandy: To help dry up your milk.
Jim: Wh-What happens to the cabbage leaves?
Mandy: That's your question?

Georgie: Good news, my mail's finally coming to this address.
Audrey: Oh, joy. [hits dough with a rolling pin]

Mandy: What's that?
Georgie: My very first credit card.
Mandy: Oh.
Audrey: You never had one before?
Georgie: Nope. Blockbuster card, Subway card. That's it.
Audrey: Not even a library card?
Georgie: [chuckles] Good one.