Georgie: Oh, you don't need to hire anybody. Me and Ruben'll do it.
Jim: Do what?
Georgie: Paint the outside of the store.
Ruben: Oh. 'Cause I'm Hispanic, I know how to paint buildings?
Georgie: No, no, no, that ain't what I meant. And for the record, I've never once thought of you as Hispanic.
Ruben: What do you think I am?
Georgie: Well, mean and unhappy.
Ruben: That's fair.

Jim: Ruben, you seen my son-in-law?
Ruben: You mean Typhoid Georgie? No.

Ruben: [whistling a tune] Lincoln's done.
Jim: Great. Get started on the Caddy.
Ruben: Yeah. Before that, how about we talk about my raise?
Jim: What makes you think you're getting a raise?
Ruben: [chuckles] I mean, look around. I'm all you got.
Jim: Really? You're gonna use this whole Georgie situation to squeeze me?
Ruben: I thought that was clear, yes.
Jim: I'll take it under consideration.
Ruben: Don't take too long. I hear Fagenbacher's hiring. [short chuckle] [whistling a tune]
Jim: Quit whistling.
Ruben: No.

Ruben: Hold this.
Georgie: What is it?
Ruben: Transmission fluid recirculator.
Georgie: Hmm. Got it.
Ruben: Do not let go.
Georgie: Why? What'll happen?
Ruben: Bad things. Very bad things. [walks off]
Georgie: Where you going?
Ruben: Be right back.
Georgie: Okeydoke.

Ruben: Why are you reading Cosmo?
Georgie: Trying to learn how women think. Did you know there's a lot of dirty stuff in here?
Ruben: Are there pictures?
Georgie: Sometimes.
Ruben: Hmm.
Georgie: Listen to this, "The Health Benefits of Sex." "Travels in His... Erogenous Zone"? I don't know what that is.

Mandy: I don't know, Georgie, it kind of seems like the frog and the boiling water.
Georgie: What's that?
Mandy: Well, it's a metaphor. The frog is in a pot of water, and the heat gets turned up little by little so it doesn't notice it's boiling.
Georgie: Who's boiling a frog?
Mandy: It doesn't matter.
Georgie: Are they making frog soup?
Mandy: It's not a real thing.
Georgie: Oh, good, 'cause I would not eat frog soup.
Mandy: I-I'm just saying, my mom's gradually starting to like you, so maybe don't turn up the heat too fast.

Georgie: I figure, with just a few changes, we could be the only woman-friendly tire store in town.
Mandy: This ought to be good. What changes?
Georgie: For starters, we got some lady magazines for the waiting area.
Jim: And flavored creamers for the coffee.
Georgie: Fat-free. Y'all like fat-free.