Mandy: Georgie, what's going on?
Georgie: I don't want you to worry.
Mandy: You can't tell somebody not to worry and expect them not to worry. They're gonna worry.
Georgie: Okay, fine. After I left, I started having some chest pains, so I went to the hospital.
Mandy: Oh, my God!
Georgie: See? Now you're worried.

Jim: Son, don't feel bad, lots of guys struggle with emotional stuff.
Georgie: Ever happen to you?
Jim: Sure.
Georgie: What do you do?
Jim: [holding a slice of bacon] I find what's most helpful is eating healthy and exercise.
Mandy: Dad...
Jim: You want the truth? 'Cause it's dark. [eats bacon]

Georgie: I may not have been completely honest about having everything under control. Truth is, I'm flying by the seat of my pants and my pants are on fire. I'm stressed out, all the time. How'd you do it? How'd you make it look so easy? Fine, don't tell me. Okay, I should go. [sighs] This was good. Thanks for listening. Hey, maybe you can ask the big guy to keep an eye on your daughter. Send an angel, get her in the Army, something. Hurry.

Missy Cooper: This is weird.
Georgie: Just talk to him. I really think you'll feel better.
Missy Cooper: I think I'll feel stupid.
Georgie: Hey, I didn't tell Mom about you getting suspended, the least you can do is tell Dad.
Missy Cooper: [exasperated sigh] Fine.
Georgie: Hey, Dad. Look who I brought. It's Missy, in case you can only hear.

Georgie: What's that old saying? Read 'em and weep.
Audrey: Damn it.
Jim: Good job, partner.
Audrey: Is this really your first time playing bridge?
Georgie: [chuckles] Guess I'm just lucky. I mean, look at the family I married into.

Audrey: Amanda, you need to up your game.
Mandy: [scoffs] I'll do you one better. I'm up and I'm out.
Audrey: You can't quit in the middle.
Mandy: Well, I think I hear the baby.
Audrey: I think I hear a baby, too.

Jim: Oh, come on, Mandy, we're having fun.
Mandy: Are we?

Georgie: Tell you what, why don't we switch partners? I'll play with your mama.
Audrey: Now we're talking.
Jim: Aw, why do I get Mandy?
Mandy: I'm not that bad.
Jim: You are.
Mandy: Am I?
Georgie: Oh, what do I know? I'm just a beginner. [spreads the cards]

Beth: Oh, my God, how long does it take to finish a slice of pie?
Mandy: I know, but it's kind of romantic the way they look at each other.
Beth: What makes you think they're a couple? Maybe they're brother and sister in some kind of sick relationship.
Mandy: [scoffs] What is wrong with you?
Beth: I'm not rooting for it. I said it was sick.

Mandy: It was so nice to hang out with a woman who didn't give birth to me.
Georgie: Well, a couple pretty women at the bar, you must have gotten hit on.
Mandy: Actually, not at all.
Georgie: Oh. Well, they must've saw your wedding ring and didn't want to be disrespectful.
Mandy: Good. Yeah. That's why.

Georgie: When you got married, did you still have other friends?
Jim: Oh, yeah, tons.
Georgie: What about after you had kids?
Jim: Oh, no, life as I knew it ended.
Georgie: But you were fine with that, right?
Jim: I get the feeling you want me to say yes.

Georgie: I don't know, Mandy's just got in my head about us having a social life.
Jim: So? You must have lots of friends.
Georgie: I do. I mean, I did. Maybe I don't.
Jim: Well, hang in there. When CeeCee gets a little older, she'll make friends and you'll pretend to like their parents.
Georgie: Maybe I will like 'em.
Jim: You won't, they're awful.

Ruben: You know, after work on Fridays, me and my buddies play a little half-court basketball.
Georgie: Cool.
Ruben: Yeah, and after we grab pizza and beer.
Georgie: Sounds fun.
Ruben: [chuckling] It is. It really is. [walks off]
Jim: I've gone with them. It's a good time.

Mandy: Well, why don't you come with me? I know Beth wants to meet you.
Georgie: I ain't gonna get in the way of your girl talk?
Mandy: [chuckles] Girl talk? What's girl talk?
Georgie: I don't know. Guys' butts, panties?
Mandy: Put on a clean shirt, you're coming with me.

Beth: So how did you two meet?
Georgie: She came into the Laundromat I was working at, and I asked her out.
Beth: Laundromat. Sexy.
Georgie: It was really a front for a backroom gambling operation.
Mandy: That sexy enough for you?

Georgie: She was worried I was a little too young, so I lied about my age.
Mandy: Mm-hmm. You sure did.
Georgie: Hey, you lied about your age, too.
Mandy: Anyhoo, too much tequila, not enough condoms, here we are.
Beth: Nice.
Georgie: I eventually told her the truth.
Mandy: Yep. And we fell in love.
Beth: That's sweet, you started with lies and ended with love. I went the other way.

Beth: [laughing awkwardly] So, 19...
Mandy: Yeah, he's- he's very mature for his age.
Beth: I'm sure.
Mandy: And, you know, most days I-I don't even think about it.
Beth: And why would you?
Mandy: He's a good father and a hard worker.
Beth: I bet the sex is amazing.
Mandy: Oh, well, he does bring a certain youthful energy to the party.
Beth: Do tell.
Mandy: I think I've told enough.

Beth: You know, sometimes I look at Todd's friends and...
Mandy: Oh, Beth, no.
Beth: What? You married one.
Mandy: Yeah.

Todd: Sorry, I don't mean nothing by it. New school nurse is hot. And she's like 23.
Georgie: There you go. What we doing here?
Todd: Just tightening the brakes.
Georgie: Well, let me help you.
Todd: Hey, isn't your sister a freshman this year?
Georgie: We've talked about this. Older's better.

Jim: How can we be sure this isn't some stupid thing only he knows exists?
Audrey: Good point. [Connor shrugs] Do it.
Jim: Are you some stupid thing only you know exists?
Connor: No. Twelve.
Audrey: So you're sure we'd know...?
Jim: No, don't waste one. It's something we know.
Audrey: Okay, okay.