Jim: What's all this?
Audrey: I'm teaching the boys how to knit.
Jim: You're kidding.
Georgie: I got through the front door!
Connor: Nice!
Audrey: Nice.
Jim: They should bring back the draft.

Jim: Well, be careful. I own a timeshare in Florida 'cause the saleslady looked like Raquel Welch.
Georgie: I don't know who that is.
Jim: Oh, she was a knockout. Had curves in all the right places. She wore this fur bikini in a movie. Man, I still think about it.
Georgie: Fur bikini?
Ruben: Was she cold?
Jim: Get back to work. [exits]
Georgie: [snorts] "Curves in all the right places."
Ruben: Dude is old.

Jim: Well, here's an idea, how about you take some night classes, brush up on your computer skills and get a nice, cushy office job?
Mandy: Office job? Why did I spend six years getting a degree in Communications?
Jim: I asked that question for six years.
Mandy: Well, I'm not giving up on my dream.
Audrey: No one's saying that.
Jim: I am.

Jim: You know, Georgie's right, when you don't hear people laughing, it's hard to know what's funny. [Georgie and Mandy's First Marriage studio audience laughs]

Audrey: It's gonna go great.
Mandy: Yeah, I think so, too.
Audrey: So, are you feeling more confident about all this?
Mandy: Yeah. Yeah, I can do this. You know, I bet it goes so well that they ask me to fill in again next week. And then they'll probably recommend me to the affiliate in Houston, and... and then they'll offer me the job and I'll have to tell Georgie we need to move and he's not gonna want to and it's gonna be a huge fight and I don't want to move CeeCee away from her grandparents but this is my dream job! [goes back into the dressing room]
Audrey: Look at the bright side: maybe you'll stink.

Audrey: You're taking care of him?
Connor: Trying to. He is not an easy patient.
Audrey: Did you threaten him with the thermometer?
Connor: I had to.
Audrey: Always worked with you.

[dream sequence:]
George Sr.: Morning.
Georgie: Yeah, good morning.
George Sr.: Something wrong?
Georgie: Yeah. I'm worried if I work myself into the ground, I won't be around for my daughter.
George Sr.: I get that.
Georgie: 'Cause I want to be there when she has kids.
George Sr.: Well, hopefully it's a lot later than when you had kids.
Georgie: From your mouth to God's ears.
George Sr.: I did a good job raising you.
Georgie: You did.
George Sr.: Wasn't easy, 'cause you were a pain in the ass.
Georgie: I thought we were having a moment.
George Sr.: We are, son.