Meemaw: [to CeeCee] Forget the turkey, I'm gonna gobble you up.
Dale Ballard: I won't be eating any children.
Georgie: Thank y'all so much for coming.
Meemaw: You bet.
Dale Ballard: I had no choice.

Jim: So, Dale... when are you two kids gonna make it official?
Dale Ballard: I've asked repeatedly.
Meemaw: We don't need to get married. We're fine just as we are.
Dale Ballard: No, she's hoping somebody better comes along.
Meemaw: Don't you want the best for me?
Mandy: Okay, CeeCee's napping. What'd I miss?
Dale Ballard: She don't want to marry me.

Georgie: I really appreciate you coming.
Missy Cooper: Well, I knew how important it was to you.
Georgie: What'd she bribe you with?
Missy Cooper: Nothing. She just asked nicely.
Georgie: You're a lying sack of you-know-what.

Georgie: I can't believe you got 'em all here.
Mandy: Well, what can I say? You knocked up a pretty special lady.

Dale Ballard: [plays guitar and sings, with Connor playing along on accordion] ♪ I fell into a burning ring of fire ♪ ♪ I went down, down, down ♪ And the flames went higher ♪ And it burns, burns, burns - Ouch! ♪ That ring of fire ♪ That ring of fire ♪
Meemaw: [to Mandy] Still better than camping.
Connor: Everybody.
All: ♪ I fell into a burning ring of fire ♪
Jim: [Audrey kicks Jim awake] Huh?
All: ♪ Went down, down, down ♪ And the flames get higher ♪
Dale Ballard: Come on, Jim!
Jim: [half-asleep] ♪ Burns, burns ♪
All: ♪ That ring of fire ♪ That ring of fire ♪

Georgie: I was thinking, maybe we can spend Thanksgiving at my mom's. You know, it's the first one since my dad passed.
Mandy: Of course.
Georgie: You're the best.
Mandy: I know.
Georgie: So, who's gonna tell your mom?
Mandy: I'm sure when we're not there she'll figure it out.

Georgie: Want to rock-paper-scissors for it?
Mandy: Or you tell her and I won't squirt you.
Georgie: You wouldn't dare.
Mandy: You're gonna smell so pretty.
Georgie: Get that away from me.
Mandy: Come here! Come here!
Georgie: No.
Mandy: Baby.

Georgie: While I'm here, I wanted to let you know we're gonna come to your place for Thanksgiving.
Mary Cooper: Oh. I'm not doing Thanksgiving this year.
Georgie: What are you talking about?
Mary Cooper: Well, Sheldon's in school, and Missy got invited to a friend's.
Georgie: Well, she can't go. It's Thanksgiving.
Mary Cooper: I already told her she could. And to be perfectly honest, I don't feel like celebrating.
Georgie: But this was Dad's favorite holiday.
Mary Cooper: I know, and doing it without him would just be too hard.

Georgie: [on the phone] Oh, come on, Missy. If you come, Mom has to.
Missy Cooper: Why are you making this such a big deal?
Georgie: It's a big deal 'cause we're gonna be together as a family.
Missy Cooper: Is Sheldon coming?
Georgie: We're gonna mostly be together as a family.
Missy Cooper: Well, I've made other plans.
Georgie: [sighs] Please. Mom needs this.
Missy Cooper: Mom needs a lobotomy.
Georgie: All right, I'm done asking. I'm telling you you're coming. [click, dial tone]
Mandy: So, is she coming?
Georgie: That's not funny.

Mandy: Here, let me try.
Georgie: Yeah, sure. Why not?
Mandy: [on the phone] Hey, Missy, it's Mandy. About Thanksgiving... [click, dial tone]
Georgie: Mm-hmm. Hurts, don't it?

Mary Cooper: If this is about Thanksgiving, I'm not changing my mind.
Mandy: Well, your mom and Missy are coming.
Mary Cooper: I don't care.
Mandy: Look, I understand, I really do. I-I just think...
Mary Cooper: You do not understand. You do not know what it's like to lose a husband.
Mandy: I don't, um, but Georgie's struggling, too, and I think it would be great...
Mary Cooper: Well, I'm sorry if I'm disappointing everyone, but this is what I need. And for once, I am putting myself first.
Mandy: Okay. Sorry.

Audrey: Go easy, Jim.
Jim: My second one.
Audrey: It's 10:00 in the morning.
Jim: [Well, I'd put it back, but... [removes bottlecap] it's already open.

Mandy: Good call on the socks.
Missy Cooper: I'm not stupid.

Audrey: That beer for you?
Georgie: No, ma'am, Mr. McAllister.
Audrey: Another one?
Georgie: Uh, I haven't been keeping count.
Audrey: Well, you let him know I am.
Georgie: Or you let him know and I'll stay here and mash them potatoes.
Audrey: [angrily mashes potatoes] Tell him.

Meemaw: I hope it wasn't too much trouble adding a bunch of people at the last minute.
Jim: No problem at all. Audrey loves this.
Meemaw: Does she need any help?
Jim: I have no idea.

Connor: Welcome, everyone. As a special surprise, I have composed a Thanksgiving polka for accordion and turkey call. [plays according slowly] [plays rapidly] [turkey call warbles] [continues playing accordion] [turkey call]
Dale Ballard: You stay right there, I got my guitar in the trunk.
Meemaw: No.

Meemaw: You sure made your son happy today.
Mary Cooper: I'm glad. I thought you were going camping.
Meemaw: So did Dale.
Dale Ballard: What?
Meemaw: Just eat.
Dale Ballard: Okay.

Audrey: Where you going?
Jim: To get another beer. [exits]
Audrey: Excuse me. [exits]
Mandy: Oh, boy.
Connor: Here comes one of our Thanksgiving traditions.

Audrey: Put that back, you've had enough.
Jim: It's a holiday, I'm celebrating.
Audrey: You're embarrassing yourself is what you're doing.
Jim: I'm having a good time! Maybe you need a drink.
Audrey: I have been up since the crack of dawn putting this thing together. You are not gonna ruin it.
Jim: Oh, I'm not "rooning" anything. R-Roonin... Ru-in-ing.
Audrey: Oh, my God, listen to yourself.
Jim: Eh, I'd rather listen to me than you.

Georgie: Where you going?
Mary Cooper: I'm sorry, I can't do this.
Georgie: Don't mind them, they argue all the time.
Mary Cooper: It's not them.
Georgie: Then what?
Mary Cooper: I...
Georgie: Tell me.
Mary Cooper: [sighs] [chuckles softly] Your father and I used to argue about him getting drunk on Thanksgiving, and... I'll never get to do that again.
Georgie: You miss arguing with Dad?
Mary Cooper: Yes. [sobs]
Georgie: Mom...
Mary Cooper: I'm going home. Please tell everybody I'm sorry.
Georgie: No, wait. I got a better idea.