Georgie: I can't wait to meet the Hankook tire guys.
Jim: Mm-hmm.
Georgie: I learned how to say "hi" in Korean. Annyeong.
Jim: How'd you learn that?
Georgie: Called Sheldon. He also taught me, hwajangsil-eun eodie.
Jim: What's that mean?
Georgie: Where's the bathroom?
Jim: Why does your brother know Korean?
Georgie: Why does he know Klingon? I've learned not to ask.

Jim: Where'd you learn to play blackjack like that?
Georgie: My meemaw taught me.
Jim: Well, that figures. How much you up?
Georgie: She also taught me to never answer that question.
Jim: Aw, come on, I'll tell you how I did.
Georgie: I watched you play. I know how you did.
Jim: Yeah, well... I'll make it back tomorrow.
Georgie: Not if you keep hittin' on a 12 when the dealer shows a six.
Jim: I had a feeling.

Georgie: I really want to thank you for trying to straighten things out with my mom.
Audrey: I'm glad someone appreciates it.
Georgie: For what it's worth, I think Mandy was a little out of line.
Audrey: I'm used to it. Everything's always my fault.
Georgie: Not true. Getting pregnant... that one, she blames square on me.
Audrey: As do I.
Georgie: She had a little something to do with it, but I'll spare you the details.
Audrey: Thank you.

Georgie: As for my mom, I can't tell you how many times she's butt heads with my dad, my meemaw, my sister, Sheldon, of course. Heck, once she had a falling-out with Jesus.
Audrey: Poor Jesus.
Georgie: Yeah, hasn't he suffered enough?
Audrey: She ever fight with you?
Georgie: I dropped out of school and got a girl pregnant at 17. What do you think?

Georgie: [sighs] I thought you might like a little baby time.
Mary Cooper: I would.
Georgie: But first... I need you to fix this mess with Audrey.
Mary Cooper: I'm not the one who needs to fix it.
Georgie: Last time she tried, didn't go so great.
Mary Cooper: That's her fault.
Georgie: I don't care. You two fighting's got to stop.
Mary Cooper: This has nothing to do with you.
Georgie: Yes, it does. I'm sleeping on the couch 'cause of y'all. I woke up at, like, 1 in the morning, some weird guy named "Conan" was on TV.

Georgie: Your dad's being a jerk.
Mandy: Maybe, but we still have to live under his roof. At least until we make some money.
Georgie: Don't worry about money. I'll get another job.
Mandy: You sure about that?
Georgie: Positive. Before you know it, we'll be in a giant house of our own.
Mandy: Right, the one with the pool shaped like a tire.
Georgie: Exactly.
Mandy: Which is just a circle.
Georgie: There's a hot tub in the middle. It'll make sense when you see it.

Georgie: I'm fine. Besides, Cooper men don't take sick days. My dad once had his appendix out, he was at work later that afternoon.
Jim: Really?
Georgie: Yeah. I mean, he passed out in the teachers' lounge, but he passed out at work.
Jim: Son, I'm not sure you're taking the right lesson from that story.
Georgie: Sure I am. Tough it out.
Jim: No, I don't think so.

[dream sequence:]
George Sr.: So, how's my granddaughter doing?
Georgie: Amazing. Walking, talking. [chuckles] She tried to eat a pickle the other day. You should have seen the faces she was making.
George Sr.: You ate a tub of Vaseline once.
Georgie: Why'd I do that?
George Sr.: Hungry? Dumb? Who could say? Why aren't you at work?
Georgie: I'm sick.
George Sr.: Well, la-dee-da. Aren't you the delicate flower? When I was 19, I didn't take sick days. 'Course, I was in Vietnam.
Georgie: Really? You didn't get sick days in the Army?
George Sr.: Nah, that's for them mama's boys in the Navy.

[dream sequence:]
Georgie: Did you ever miss a day of work?
George Sr.: Yeah, when I had my first heart attack. Did you have a heart attack?
Georgie: No, sir, just runny nose, scratchy throat.
George Sr.: Oh, serious.
Georgie: And a fever. 102.
George Sr.: Poor baby. Should I sing you "Soft Kitty?"
Georgie: I'm going back.
George Sr.: Good man. [Georgie stands up and hugs his father] What you doing?
Georgie: Hugging you.
[When Georgie pulls back and looks up at his father, George Sr. looks like a rotting zombie]
George Sr.: Get to work!
[reality: Georgie gasps as he wakes up, sweaty in bed]

[dream sequence:]
George Sr.: Morning.
Georgie: Yeah, good morning.
George Sr.: Something wrong?
Georgie: Yeah. I'm worried if I work myself into the ground, I won't be around for my daughter.
George Sr.: I get that.
Georgie: 'Cause I want to be there when she has kids.
George Sr.: Well, hopefully it's a lot later than when you had kids.
Georgie: From your mouth to God's ears.
George Sr.: I did a good job raising you.
Georgie: You did.
George Sr.: Wasn't easy, 'cause you were a pain in the ass.
Georgie: I thought we were having a moment.
George Sr.: We are, son.

Ruben: Why are you reading Cosmo?
Georgie: Trying to learn how women think. Did you know there's a lot of dirty stuff in here?
Ruben: Are there pictures?
Georgie: Sometimes.
Ruben: Hmm.
Georgie: Listen to this, "The Health Benefits of Sex." "Travels in His... Erogenous Zone"? I don't know what that is.

Georgie: I figure, with just a few changes, we could be the only woman-friendly tire store in town.
Mandy: This ought to be good. What changes?
Georgie: For starters, we got some lady magazines for the waiting area.
Jim: And flavored creamers for the coffee.
Georgie: Fat-free. Y'all like fat-free.

Mandy: I don't know, Georgie, it kind of seems like the frog and the boiling water.
Georgie: What's that?
Mandy: Well, it's a metaphor. The frog is in a pot of water, and the heat gets turned up little by little so it doesn't notice it's boiling.
Georgie: Who's boiling a frog?
Mandy: It doesn't matter.
Georgie: Are they making frog soup?
Mandy: It's not a real thing.
Georgie: Oh, good, 'cause I would not eat frog soup.
Mandy: I-I'm just saying, my mom's gradually starting to like you, so maybe don't turn up the heat too fast.