Mandy: Hey. What are you doing?
Connor: Taking care of Georgie.
Mandy: Georgie's here?
Connor: Yes. He's very sick.
Mandy: Oh, my God.
Connor: Oh, wait. Here's some Vicks. He would not let me rub it on his chest.

Georgie: You shouldn't be in here. I don't want to get you sick.
Mandy: Oh, I'll be fine.
Georgie: No, you need to stay healthy for your weather thing.
Mandy: Right, my weather thing. Listen, if this doesn't go well, will you be disappointed in me?
Georgie: Of course not. I could never be disappointed in you.
Mandy: Thank you. And if it does go well, will you move to Houston with me?
Georgie: Houston?
Mandy: Never mind. [throws Vicks] Here, rub this on your chest.
Georgie: Houston?!

Audrey: I can't sleep.
Jim: Well, lucky for you, I'm awake.
Audrey: I'm nervous about Mandy.
Jim: Oh, she's gonna be great.
Audrey: That's the problem. What if this leads to something bigger? What if she gets a job offer in Houston or Dallas? What if they move and take CeeCee? I can't lose my granddaughter, Jim.
Jim: Look, nothing's happened yet.
Audrey: I know. But if they're moving, we're moving.
Jim: Wait, what about the store?
Audrey: Oh, you'll figure it out. Good night. [turns out the light]

Mandy: [on TV] Thank you, Kimberly. I've got your weekend weather report. Let's get right into it.
Georgie: Look, CeeCee, there's Mama.
Jim: Well, I like what she's wearing.
Audrey: You're welcome.
Mandy: But there's a cold weather front moving in from Nacogdoches, so expect some precipitation tomorrow.
Connor: "Nacogdoches" and "precipitation." [short chuckle] Tough combo.
Audrey: You know, that map isn't really there. It's just green.
Mandy: Overnight, into the morning, we'll be seeing some wind gusts which should clear out those clouds.
Georgie: Dang, she's really good.
Mandy: ...for all you churchgoers. I'm Mandy McAllister. Heather will be back with the weather on Monday, unless she needs a few extra days with her family, which would be very understandable, given the tragedy that's befallen her. Now back to Chip, with sports.

Georgie: [sniffing] Smell this.
Mandy: I will not.
Georgie: I just want to know if I can wear it again.
Mandy: Well, I think if you have to ask, you have your answer.
Georgie: Great. [puts the shirt on]

Mandy: Well, I'm a woman, Georgie. They talk down to me and then they hit on me.
Georgie: Well, that's got to feel nice.
Mandy: No.
Georgie: There's places I get treated different, too, 'cause I'm a man.
Mandy: Really? Like where?
Georgie: Uh, like when I take CeeCee to the park. All the moms act like I'm some kind of hero for taking care of my kid.
Mandy: That's your example?
Georgie: Yeah, and then they hit on me. [off Mandy's look] It-it was horrible?

Georgie: Hey, let me ask you something, why didn't your wife bring it in?
Don: I don't know. She makes me do the car stuff.
Georgie: Mm. Hmm. Makes sense. You think there's anything in here that would make her feel uncomfortable?
Don: Why?
Georgie: I just think it'd be great if this were a place your wife wanted to come.
Don: Why do you want my wife to come here?
Georgie: No, not just your wife, any wife. And not just wives - moms, daughters, we want 'em all.
Don: Okay.
Georgie: [to Don] Hey, tell your wife, McAllister Auto loves the ladies.

Georgie: You ever wonder why we don't get many women customers?
Jim: Not after that.
Georgie: Well, I've come to realize there's some places women don't feel welcome, and I don't want this to be one of 'em.
Jim: Well, cars are just more of a guy thing.
Georgie: Women drive cars, too.
Ruben: That's why there's so many accidents, am I right? [Jim and Ruben laugh]
Jim: You might be onto something.

Georgie: "11 Secrets of World-Class Lovers."
Ruben: 11? I only got 2, 3 tops.
Georgie: "Number one: Communication."
Ruben: Mm, next.
Georgie: "Number two: Be enthusiastic."
Ruben: Brother, if a girl's getting naked, I'm enthusiastic.
Georgie: Agreed.
Ruben: Mm-hmm.
Georgie: "Number three: Engage the senses."
Ruben: What's that mean?
Georgie: Mm, "Soft lighting, scented candles."
Ruben: Ugh, boring. Next.
Georgie: Ooh, this is good. "When to lick and when to bite."
Ruben: Ooh.

Jim: What are you jackasses doing?
Ruben: Learning about women.
Georgie: Uh, for business purposes.
Ruben: Mm-hmm.
Jim: How does "licking and biting" help business?
Georgie: Well, that one don't, but there's other things in here that can.
Ruben: Wait, go back, what are we licking, what are we biting?
Jim: Go back to fixing cars.
Ruben: Okay, okay. [exits]
Jim: So what's the answer?

Jim: We picked up a few of them fancy-smelling candles.
Mandy: Did you at least clean the bathroom?
Georgie: Don't need to. We got candles.
Mandy: Did it ever occur to you to ask a woman what she'd like?
Jim: No.
Georgie: In our defense, there weren't none around. [Mandy points to herself and Audrey]
Jim: And now there are. So what you got?
Audrey: Well, first of all, candles are not cleaning products.
Georgie: [scoffs] At 12 bucks a pop, they should be.
Jim: You spent 12 bucks on a candle?
Georgie: It was lavender.

Mandy: Candles aren't gonna change anything. Tire stores are just kind of a dude space.
Georgie: Okay, well, what if a woman worked there?
Jim: Mm. I can't afford another employee.
Georgie: Well, Mrs. McAllister could do it.
Audrey: You want me there?
Mandy: [laughing] You want her there? [off Audrey's look] Oh, you were surprised, too.

Audrey: I suppose I could come in a few days a week. [chuckles] Jim, what do you think?
Jim: Um... always love having you around.
Audrey: Nice try.
Jim: No, honey, really, it's great.
Georgie: Just move on.
Audrey: You want to make the store more woman-friendly, first thing we do is clean the bathroom.
Jim: [grunts] Fair enough. [sniffles] [sighs] Probably gonna need a toilet seat, too.
Mandy: Oh, my God.

Georgie: Can I tell you a secret?
Mandy: Sure.
Georgie: When I was little, I had one of those stuffed frog toys.
Mandy: Uh-huh?
Georgie: It freaked me out.

Audrey: Good morning, Ruben.
Ruben: Oh. Hey, Mrs. McAllister. This is a nice surprise.
Jim: Yeah, she gonna be helping us out up front for a while.
Ruben: Phasing Georgie out. Love it.
Jim: We're not phasing anyone out.
Georgie: [enters] Hey.
Ruben: Oh, come on, he's right there. Do it.

Georgie: You try any of those flavored creamers? Hazelnut's pretty tasty.
Audrey: I prefer half-and-half.
Georgie: You know, I have always wondered, what's the half and what's the other half?
Audrey: It's cream and milk.
Georgie: Hmm, kind of a letdown.
Jim: How we doing over here?
Georgie: Great. She's a fountain of information.
Audrey: Drink from me.

Jim: So what's the plan?
Audrey: Well, for starters, I think I'm gonna go buy some plants, flowers. Ooh, maybe a little music.
Georgie: Mm, engaging the senses. [chuckles] That's right out of Cosmo.
Audrey: And this floor, does it bother you that it's sticky?
Jim: Well, no, that's a safety precaution. Yeah. Never had a slip and fall.
Audrey: Jim, it's filthy.
Jim: Well, we're not eating off it, we're walking on it.
Audrey: Georgie, go to the hardware store and buy a mop, Pine-Sol, some wire brushes.
Georgie: I can pick up that toilet seat while I'm at it.
Audrey: This is my second cup of coffee. Please hurry.

Audrey: Just think about it: a Mother's Day sale, all moms get half off.
Jim: We'd lose money.
Georgie: In the short term, but you'd gain clients who would come back, and not just on Mother's Day. You got your President's Day, your Labor Day, your Yom Kippur.

Jim: Connor?
Connor: [takes headphones off] Yeah.
Jim: You ordered a pizza?
Connor: On its way. [Jim exits] [dials phone] Yes, I'd like to order a pizza.

Audrey: I'm just saying, a new coat of paint out front would really freshen the place up.
Jim: Yeah, let me guess, pink?
Audrey: [scoffs] Don't be silly. [chuckles] Terracotta.
Jim: The hell is terracotta?
Georgie: Oh, like an earthy red, very classy.